Nope, that's not a funky name for a look, it's actually a half assed recipe of mine!
I can't cook but I can make salads! No burners required. Most of the time...
Salads rock because you just throw a bunch of crap together and VOILA! Tasty town!
Okay that was lame...
So when I was little and could make KD I would go through my mom's spice cupboard (yes, we had an entire cupboard of spices, not including the spice rack on the wall and the one inside the pantry) and I would stick the cheese powder in a bowl and raid the cupboards and toss in around 5 or 6 different spices that smelled good and in the end after the noodles were done and I mixed my lil mess, it came out tasting like pizza! PIZZA KRAFT DINNER! Greatest accident ever.
That's kind of how I come to making stuff now. Mix stuff together, hope for the best.
Chick Pea salad is pretty fool proof. Even my parents ate it and went back for seconds and then later told me they hated chick peas but liked the salad so WIN!
Crap to use:
1 Can drained and rinsed Chick Peas (Garbanzo beans)
1 Can drained and rinsed mixed bean mix
1 Can Corn drained
Half a Leek for it's oniony goodness taste and crunch
Half a Cucumber, cuz who doesn't like cucumber?
Some Cherry Tomatoes chopped in half if they are on sale, which they weren't so they aren't making an appearance today but I'm including them in the list cuz that's how I roll
Lemon Juice
Lime Juice
Avocado Oil (or any oil, I just heard avocado oil is like the holy grail healthy skin oil and we kinda stockpiled the stuff when we found it at Winners)
Calorie Wise Italian Dressing if you want
Seasoning Salt, or some kinda fancy schmancy salt, for added uhmm saltiness.
Hot Sauce
Freeze Dried Salad mix stuff (pic included)
Okay so that list looks massive, but I rambled a ton so here's a pic with the gist of it:
STEP 1:
Drain the chick peas, mixed beans and corn and rinse the crud off. Toss in a big ass bowl and swear at yourself because the bowl looks too small.
STEP DOS:
Cut up half a leek and half a cucumber. I like super thin slices to get a bit of everything in a bite and not just a mouthful of onion taste. That's what the leek tastes like. Oniony fresh. Depending on my mood, I also switch out the leek and use green onions instead. I wanted crunchy so the leek was used today.
STEP MISSING:
Cut 10ish cherry tomatoes in half and plop right in. It's step missing cuz I didn't do that today, but do it if you can. It makes the dish extra colourful and pretty.
(Check out that 30 second art job. skillz. I has dem.)
STEP ELEBENTY:
Get juicy and stuff. I don't actually measure anything so now comes the bigger guessing part.
For the lemon juice and the lime juice, it seems I just slosh the bottle over the bowl about 7 times each.
The Avocado oil looked about 1 tablespoon drizzled on top.
Italian dressing was about 8 quick shakes or less. I use the calorie wise stuff because I want to put avocado oil in and don't need that extra oilyness the full fat italian dressing has. Or just skip it altogether, WHATEVZ YO!
The hot sauce is guess drizzled around also. I like the Jim Beam Original Hot Sauce. It's a bitch to find and I only seem to find it every 3 years so the last time I saw it in Winners, I grabbed ALL 9 BOTTLES! Tis nummers I say.
Sprinkle some salt on it! SALT!
Mix it alllll up and take a look:
It still lacked something (damn pricey ass tomatoes) so I grabbed a bottle of this freeze dried salad seasoning blend stuff:
I love this stuff. It's dried green onion, red onion, garlic and white onion I think. It's found in the produce section. This stuff rocks when you stick it in a tub of cottage cheese and let it hydrate. Mmmmm oniony.
There, that added some more greeny bits :)
And there you have it. HEALTHY STUFF!
Probably the only healthy thing I'll eat second helpings of...
Propylactic Double Mastectomy Update
6 days ago
Mmmmm, looks good!
ReplyDeleteI need to check out the avocado oil - I love avocados!!
Oooooh I would totally eat this sans the cucumbers (smell and taste makes me gag), and I'm not even a fan of salad!
ReplyDelete@cinseven13 The weird stuff with this oil, it tastes nothin like avocados sadly! And it's terrible for stoping stuff from sticking to the pan so I only use it in salads now. Trying to fry a burger patty turns into an angry hamburger splat :D
ReplyDelete@Dazzlepantsofawesome YOU NO LIKEY THE CUCUMBERS?! You would hate this dutch salad my mom makes then lol, shredded cucumbers, oil, vinegar, salt and pepper. Big ol bowl of green :)
LOL,this was the most amusing recipe I've ever read! I must say that the cherry tomato diagram was quite helpful, I could not complete the recipe without it LOL! Salads rule, they are healthy and taste good and I can't really cook either so I'm going to try this one out and take a trip to TASTY TOWN!
ReplyDeletehahahaha TASTY TOWN! Population, ONE MORE! :D
ReplyDelete